Schooling Myself On Life, #FTSF

I don’t envy the person in charge of teaching me something, anything, a skill.

My teacher who taught me braille lessons in the second grade, those who’ve taught me how to get around with a cane/guide dog, my yoga teacher, violin teacher, or that of writing.

I tend to resist their lessons, I don’t have enough confidence and belief in myself, and I tend to over-think most things.

I know this should be more about life lessons, but bare with me a sec. Any skill in the world and the time in which it takes to learn it, all of it requires a look at the bigger picture.

When it comes to life’s lessons, I try to see the bigger picture, right when I should be focused on the smaller one, the elements of any skill I wish to learn. Then, I start to over think what it is I’m doing and can’t help trying to capture that bigger picture, all in one little, individual lesson.

It’s like being a photographer, wanting to see everything through a camera’s viewfinder and getting only a fractional snapshot of any one thing.

Stop over thinking everything Kerry. I must tell myself this multiple times a day. I’d say that is one of the biggest life lessons I keep learning and relearning, as if I ever wish to get anything achieved, and I’ll even resort to speaking in the third person as I’m demonstrating it.

Have more confidence in myself is another.

I was trying to learn a concept my violin teacher was attempting to impart to me at our last lesson. How to find something in every piece of music, (whether it’s a colour, place, or a texture) of a feeling, just something to relate to, the thing that makes a piece of music I’m learning on my violin unique and special to me. There’s got to be a better way, to see a piece of music, not as just a series of notes but of something more than that. I should see it, in my own head, as I’m playing. I should feel it in my bones, in my arm and hand and finger bones that hold the bow, but in every other bone in my body.

I am a writer and wish the explanation of the music were easier for me. I’m still trying to learn my notes and my arm angles and my finger placement, but that’s not enough.

Moving all that aside, how does Minuette 3 make me feel when I’m playing?

I don’t play my scales like I mean it, the piece, like I mean it.

This goes back to the part about how I approach everything and most everyone with timidness and I’m always apologizing or feeling I should be apologizing to everyone, in every situation, even with myself. This comes through in my playing and it shows itself, personification of a piece. Music must do more than get notes right, if it’s going to say something to the listener and mean something more to the performer.

As a writer, I am one who over thinks most things, but how to describe Minuette 3 as I hear those notes I’m playing?

It’s all tied together: the lessons for learning to play an instrument and those bigger life lessons people are always talking about.

These are my two biggest ones and I intend to learn them, for the better, using my favourite musical instrument as I do.

Finish the Sentence Friday: with hosts
Kristi from Finding Ninee
and her fellow sentence—thinker-upper
Kenya from Sporatically Yours.

And finally: my apologies to those who’ve had to, are currently or will ever be given the task of teaching me any skill/lessons in the future.

Oh look, there I go, apologizing again.


2 thoughts on “Schooling Myself On Life, #FTSF

  1. Agree (and identify with) pretty much everything in your post. Theres that pesky ‘need to understand’ that our people (clarks) are so prone to bringing to our interaction with the world and the people in it.

    Music can be so tricky, there is a new set of physical skills necessary to learn and then there is the business of conveying emotion in playing. I suspect the answer to practice the skills and hope for the emotion to come out of the notes. It seems like, maybe you can look to your writing, we all focus on the grammar and other technical elements until we find a story that generates a passion and that almost always is something the reader can feel, in a story.

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