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Shadows and Signs, #GroundhogDay #SongLyricSunday

New month, new me.

The other day was Groundhog Day and I never got the point of that, other than people needing some hope or sign that winter is coming to an end in this part of the world. I prefer, though I haven’t seen the movie by the same name as the day in a long time, to think of it as life evaluation. We can take a look at our habits and behaviours and see if we keep repeating the same actions (day after day, over and over again), or if we want to try something new and different for a change.

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This is a big one in love especially. February is all about love, for many, with hearts and roses and chocolates. I like the more rare things, like love poems, which not everyone can write. Song lyrics are close enough.

🙂

But I am back and taking part in another
Song Lyric Sunday
and the prompt this time, to start out the month and the theme of love, isn’t about the way I’m handling my love life in the present (thank God).

😉

It’s all about first love/crushes.

I like this Cher cover. Though, like most pop songs, it really doesn’t help clear much up and shouldn’t be taken as seriously as some lovestruck listeners might want to believe.

As for first crushes, I made mine a set of mixed tapes for Valentine’s Day. Aw, how sweet. So, I have a lot of songs I’ve been recalling to reference here. I went with this one, just because reading the signs is so maddeningly confusing.

***

“The Shoop Shoop Song (It’s In His Kiss)” (originally by Betty Everett)

Does he love me I want to know
How can I tell if he loves me so
Is it in his eyes?
Oh no! You’ll be deceived
Is it in his sighs?
Oh no! He’ll make believe
If you want to know if he loves you so
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
Is it in his face?
Oh no! That’s just his charms
In his warm embrace?
Oh no! That’s just his arms
If you want to know if he loves you so
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
Kiss him and squeeze him tight
Find out what you want to know
If it’s love, if it really is
It’s there in his kiss
How about the way he acts
Oh no! That’s not the way
And you’re not list’nin’ to all I say
If you wanna know if he loves you so
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
Hug him and squeeze him tight
Find out what you want to know
If it’s love, if it really is
It’s there in his kiss
How about the way he acts
Oh no! That’s not the way
And you’re not listnin’ to all I say
If you wanna know if he loves you so
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is
It’s in his kiss
That’s where it is

LYRICS.

***

Heck! It’s been nearly twenty years and I still hate reading the signs. Why not just come right out and ask?

What a novel idea.

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Facing Forward, #SongLyricSunday

My nephew thinks he wants to stay overnight with Grandma and Grandpa, when my mom makes him a late night snack of a grilled cheese sandwich, and my sister and brother-in-law are sad and will miss their little boy for the night.

Then, at the last minute, my nephew sees his parents leaving and he changes his mind. He is still young and his parents are his everything.

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I don’t know exactly what it’s like to feel the intensity of becoming a parent. My new niece or nephew will be here in just over a month. The feelings for their children will multiply with the second child.

I don’t know that feeling, the one my own parents would have had when their four children were born, but I do know they were there for me then, they were there for me twenty years ago when I was severely ill, and they are here for me now, whatever may happen.

I want them to know I will be okay. I can sense their concern at me going off into the unknown. They have always been there to protect their daughter, but now it will be different.

My mom is super prepared. She makes sure I have everything I could possibly need/want when I go. My dad too. They are the two most prepared people I know. They just realize, as do I, that not all eventualities can be covered.

I want them to know that everything they’ve given to me is why I want to do this, to try and figure some things out for myself and my life, which is why I need this particular journey.

***

I’ve got money in my pocket
I like the color of my hair
I’ve got a friend who loves me
Got a house, I’ve got a car
I’ve got a good mother
and her voice is what keeps me here
Feet on ground
Heart in hand
Facing forward
Be yourself
I’ve never wanted anything
No I’ve, no I’ve, I’ve never wanted anything
so bad…so bad
Cardboard masks of all the people
I’ve been
thrown out with all the rusted, tangled
dented God Damned miseries
You could say I’m hard to hold
But if you knew me you’d know
I’ve got a good father
And his strength is what makes me cry
Feet on ground
Heart in hand
Facing forward
Be yourself
I’ve never wanted anything
No I’ve, no I’ve, I’ve never
wanted anything so bad…
so bad
I’ve got money in my pocket
I like the color of my hair
I’ve got a friend who loves me
Got a house, I’ve got a car
I’ve got a good mother
and her voice is what keeps me here
Feet on ground
Heart in hand
Facing forward
Be yourself
Heart in hand
Feet on ground
Facing forward
Be yourself
just be yourself
just be yourself
Feet on ground
Heart in hand
Feet on ground
Heart in hand

Lyrics.

***

This song makes me choke up a little anytime I hear the lyrics. I’ve wanted to know, since I first heard it, that all children have parents like the ones in this song, like mine. I know, in reality, this kind of parent doesn’t exist everywhere, but it should. They should.

Mine have been everything in this song and more. They have prepared me. For this week’s
Song Lyric Sunday,
this song I’ve chosen is titled “Good Mother,” but it is about having all one could ever possibly need to be okay. Strong and dependable and loving parents are invaluable. That is them and this is me, even with all the nerves and the concerns, and I will make my good mother and my good father proud of their youngest daughter.

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The Lovable Punk, #JusJoJan

In April it will be ten years since my guide dog Croche passed away from cancer. After she died, I grieved and was lonely. This loneliness made me want another dog, but I couldn’t even think of going for another guide dog. I decided I wanted a little lap dog. I never could have imagined what I would get.

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Dobby, you are a pain in the butt. You really are. You’re so possessive, but you’re just my pet. You don’t control what I do or with whom I do it with.

Sounds harsh, but lately he has been super protective of me, not letting me have any sort of social life whatsoever. He annoys the hell out of my company, family and friends, dates. He bugs me so much, but I have had him for nearly nine years now and I am no dog trainer, even if it weren’t looking like it is pretty much too late at this advanced date anyway.

Did you drive away past men in my life? Well, okay, I can’t say that, though sometimes it feels like he helped, even in his own way.

I love Dobby. I named him after a character from Harry Potter and many people have complimented on what a cute dog he is, until they spend any real time with him I must add.

He barks madly at any visitor I happen to invite into my home. He thinks he must protect me and our house from any intruders, even though I told them to enter. Whereas, if I really had an unwelcome someone stopping by, for any less than welcomed reason, I doubt he would be able to protect me at all.

Sometimes he feels like a stocker dog, following me wherever I go, unless he can get a bit of the cat’s food or sneak into the litter box. So gross.

Some guard dog. He is not a guide dog. But…he is my dog. Boyfriends have come and gone, but Dobby is here to stay.

I just sometimes wish he could take it down a few degrees. I truly wonder what is wrong with him. You have to see it to believe it.

When I heard the prompt word for this second week of
Just Jot It January
I immediately thought of my Dobby.

What aa mongrel!

Week two of this month-long blogging exercise is commencing, of which I’ve only written twice for this year because of other things requiring my attention, but today it’s being guest hosted by
Dan of No Facilities.

I may be back again, a time or two, but the prompt today just seemed to fit,
which came from this here website.

I’m stuck with my punk of a dog, lovable and yet so incredibly irritating, all at the same time.

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Comfort and Courage (Never Or Now) #DisneyMoana #Welcome2017 #SongLyricSunday

New beginnings.

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Does this always have to mean endings?

I suppose, in many ways, it does. I don’t happen to think they are always interchangeable.

I am anxious and eager to find out what this year will bring to my life. I am a mess of emotions about it really. Interspersed in there somewhere are moments of relative calm though. I had a few of those last night, watching a Gilmore Girls and their Year in the Life four-part updated series from last November, drinking wine, and trying fondue for (what I think) was my very first time.

I will start, hopefully not from the beginning, with a renewed commitment to learning to play violin.

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I will get what I need to get done in the coming weeks, to take a journey of sorts, both literally and figuratively.

This song was from Disney’s Moana soundtrack last year. When I heard it I immediately thought I would save it to post at the start of 2017 and that
Song Lyric Sunday
would be the perfect place for it.

I am declaring myself as taking more of a journey in this year of transitions and big first steps in my life. I will conquer my fear.

***

I’ve been staring at the edge of the water ‘Long as I can remember, never really knowing why I wish I could be the perfect daughter But I come back to the water, no matter how hard I try
Every turn I take, every trail I track Every path I make, every road leads back To the place I know, where I cannot go Where I long to be
See the line where the sky meets the sea? It calls me And no one knows, how far it goes If the wind in my sail on the sea stays behind me One day I’ll know, if I go there’s just no telling how far I’ll go
Oh oh oh, oh, oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh, oh oh Oh oh oh, oh, oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh, oh oh
I know, everybody on this island seems so happy on this island Everything is by design I know, everybody on this island has a role on this island So maybe I can roll with mine
I can lead with pride, I can make us strong I’ll be satisfied if I play along But the voice inside sings a different song What is wrong with me?
See the light as it shines on the sea? It’s blinding But no one knows, how deep it goes And it seems like it’s calling out to me, so come find me And let me know, what’s beyond that line, will I cross that line?
See the line where the sky meets the sea? It calls me And no one knows, how far it goes If the wind in my sail on the sea stays behind me One day I’ll know, how far I’ll go

Alessia Cara – How Far I’ll Go (Lyrics)

***

The home I know brings me constant comfort and the courage to keep hoping and striving in life.

I know this is shaping up to be a big year, in several ways, and that some are afraid. I know, believe me, I know.

I NEED to do this.

And so, Happy 2017 to all, and Cheers to new beginnings.

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Long Month, Long Life #SongLyricSunday

I’m spending this final
Song Lyric Sunday
of 2016, talking about a song that explains something about me.

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What best describes me this time of year?

Well, this one is a part of a Christmas from my past, my childhood, which is part of a bigger picture of myself.

The memoir I’ve wanted to write for a long time had certain songs ingrained in the narrative, as so many feelings at specific moments of my life define where I was at various stages of growth and development through the years, filtered through the truths of song lyrics.

This one denotes a Christmas, twenty years ago, one where I was ill and had been for months by December, 1996, on kidney dialysis for six months by that time.

***

A long December and there’s reason to believe Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can’t remember the last thing that you said as you were leavin’ Now the days go by so fast
And it’s one more day up in the canyons And it’s one more night in Hollywood If you think that I could be forgiven…I wish you would
The smell of hospitals in winter And the feeling that it’s all a lot of oysters, but no pearls
All at once you look across a crowded room To see the way that light attaches to a girl
And it’s one more day up in the canyons And it’s one more night in Hollywood If you think you might come to California…I think you should
Drove up to Hillside Manor sometime after two a.m. And talked a little while about the year
I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower, Makes you talk a little lower about the things you could not show her
And it’s been a long December and there’s reason to believe Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can’t remember all the times I tried to tell my myself To hold on to these moments as they pass
And it’s one more day up in the canyon And it’s one more night in Hollywood It’s been so long since I’ve seen the ocean…I guess I should

Lyrics: A Long December, Counting Crows

***

“The smell of hospitals in winter. And the feeling that it’s all a lot of oysters, but no pearls,” stands out strongly from the rest of the lyrics, but a long long December/year for sure was how it felt.

All that year I had felt like crap and had felt unheard by doctors and a world who didn’t understand, but frankly, neither did I, for a long time before I received a proper diagnosis.

I heard this song on repeat, a big radio hit at the time, driving back and forth to the hospital and by December, 1996 I was ready for that particular year to come to an end, but the song and the memories would always stay with me.

My luck had been bad and I could only hope for a much improved 1997 and beyond.

This song is a snapshot of me at age twelve and it’s only so poignant because I can look back now, some twenty years onward, from that sick girl I was, to the woman I am now.

Sometimes life feels like things will never be better, like we’re destined to always suffer with something, but time does reveal how that can change.

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And Yet… #SongLyricSunday

I often wonder at how we need other people.

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Around this time of year especially, but isn’t that what all the best love songs are all about?

Song Lyric Sunday

I don’t have much more to say on the subject this week.

Going to let the words to one of my favourite songs of the moment speak for themselves instead.

***

“We Don’t Talk Anymore” (feat. Selena Gomez)

[Charlie Puth:]
We don’t talk anymore
We don’t talk anymore
We don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
We don’t love anymore
What was all of it for?
Oh, we don’t talk anymore, like we used to do…
I just heard you found the one, you’ve been looking
You’ve been looking for
I wish I would have known that wasn’t me
Cause even after all this time
I still wonder
Why I can’t move on
Just the way you did so easily
Don’t wanna know
Kind of dress you’re wearing tonight
If he’s holdin’ onto you so tight
The way I did before
I overdosed
Should’ve known your love was a game
Now I can’t get you out of my brain
Oh, it’s such a shame
That we don’t talk anymore
We don’t talk anymore
We don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
We don’t love anymore
What was all of it for?
Oh, we don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
[Selena Gomez:]
I just hope you’re lying next to somebody
Who knows how to love you like me
There must be a good reason that you’re gone
Every now and then I think you might want me to
Come show up at your door
But I’m just too afraid that I’ll be wrong
Don’t wanna know
If you’re looking into her eyes
If she’s holdin’ onto you so tight the way I did before
I overdosed
Should’ve known your love was a game
Now I can’t get you out of my brain
Oh, it’s such a shame
[Charlie Puth & Selena Gomez:]
That we don’t talk anymore
(we don’t we don’t)
We don’t talk anymore
(we don’t we don’t)
We don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
We don’t love anymore
(we don’t we don’t)
What was all of it for?
(we don’t we don’t)
Oh, we don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
Like we used to do
Don’t wanna know
Kind of dress you’re wearing tonight
If he’s giving it to you just right
The way I did before
I overdosed
Should’ve known your love was a game
Now I can’t get you out of my brain
Oh, it’s such a shame
That we don’t talk anymore
We don’t talk anymore
(we don’t we don’t)
We don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
We don’t love anymore
(we don’t we don’t)
What was all of it for?
(we don’t we don’t)
Oh, we don’t talk anymore
Like we used to do
(we don’t talk anymore)
Don’t wanna know
Kind of dress you’re wearing tonight (oh)
If he’s holding onto you so tight (oh)
The way I did before
(we don’t talk anymore)
I overdosed
Should’ve known your love was a game (oh)
Now I can’t get you out of my brain (whoa)
Oh, it’s such a shame
That we don’t talk anymore

Lyrics.

***
Or maybe that’s just the world of pop music.

I don’t know. This song is popular right now and it was playing on the radio as I was taking a great step forward in my own life and planning on going it alone. That is big for me. I just wanted to remember it.

I will always need people, but I also need to learn to depend on myself too.

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Quintessential, #SongLyricSunday #10Thankful

Question: How do I let someone know how thankful and grateful I am for their presence in my life?

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Answer: I feature them on my blog, which I try to do (a little shoutout) whenever I possibly can.

Or I let a particular song speak volumes for the gratitude I feel.

Or both.

Every weekend, or as many of them as I can, I like to write down my list of ten things I’m thankful for that week or just in general,
which all stemmed from this here blog hop.

So this week’s
Song Lyric Sunday
is an easy one really. Thankful didn’t have to be in the name of the song, but as there are likely several, one popped into my head. I think it is uncommon enough that I should be the only one who has chosen this one:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zq1xkrma76Y

I am thankful for music, songs, and song lyrics.

***

i remember what you said that day
be careful what you wish for baby cos’ it’s a crazy world outside but you’ve always got a place to hide
chorus:
you’ve shown me things that i’d never seen
gave me something that i can believe
all the love you give, it’s a healing thing and i thank you
for the common ground that you shared with me
for the higher ground, the way you lifted me
now i come to you and you comfort me and i thank you i, i, i, thank you i, i, i, i, thank you i, i, i, thank you i, i, i, i, thank you
there are chances that i had to take and mistakes that i just had to make
california dreams don’t all come true
but i could always count on you
[chorus] i remember what you said that day you’ve always known just what to say
i was blind, but now i see
thank you for forgiving me
ohhhhhh, yeah… [chorus] i, i, i thank you… thank you (fade out)

LYRICS

***

I am thankful for the chance, every so often, to combine blog hops.

I am thankful for everyone who I’ve met through the TToT and who show up on a weekly basis to share what they are thankful for in their own lives.

I am thankful for a tip-off of a radio interview of one of my favourite musical performers/artists.

I am thankful for the chance to see one of my nephew’s swimming lessons. Being back at that pool brings back a load of memories, both good and not so good ones, but I am thankful for the smell of the pool and the sounds of children loving the water and the time with family.

I am thankful for sounds that are so very special, like the sound of my unborn niece/nephew’s heartbeat. (I’m going with niece.)

🙂

Sound is one of my most valuable remaining senses, what another of my favourite weekly blog hops was all about this week.

Finish The Sentence Friday

I am thankful for pizza and birthday cake with family, for the chance to be an aunt to such wonderfully imaginative kids, and so sweet and fun too. They make me smile and laugh and believe in magic.

I am thankful for all the loved ones I’m blessed to have, those I’ve met in recent months, like my writing mentor and my violin teacher. I am lucky to have all of you in my corner.

The quintessential feeling of gratitude. I am grateful for my ability to recognize it.

THANK YOU!!!

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